>things That Hallmark Cards Don't Say - Printable Version +- FocusCanada Forums (//www.focuscanada.net/forum) +-- Forum: Canadian Focus Community (//www.focuscanada.net/forum/forumdisplay.php?fid=3) +--- Forum: Off Topic (//www.focuscanada.net/forum/forumdisplay.php?fid=16) +--- Thread: >things That Hallmark Cards Don't Say (/showthread.php?tid=7115) |
>things That Hallmark Cards Don't Say - SliverSteeda - 12-22-2006 >THINGS THAT HALLMARK CARDS DON'T SAY > >My tire was thumping >I thought it was flat >When I looked at the tire... >I noticed your cat. >Sorry! > >-------------------------------------------------------------------- >Heard your wife left you, >How upset you must be. >But don't fret about it... >She moved in with me. > >-------------------------------------------------------------------- >Looking back over the years >that we've been together, >I can't help but wonder... > >"What the hell was I thinking?" > >-------------------------------------------------------------------- >Congratulations on your wedding day! > >Too bad no one likes your husband. > >--------------------------------------------------------------------- >How could two people as beautiful as you > >Have such an ugly baby? > >------------------------------------------------------------------------ >I've always wanted to have >someone to hold, >someone to love >After having met you .. > >I've changed my mind. > >------------------------------------------------------------------------- > >I must admit, >you brought Religion into my life. > >I never believed in Hell >until I met you. > >----------------------------------------------------------------------- >As the days go by, >I think of how lucky I am... >That you're not here >to ruin it for me > >-------------------------------------------------------------- >Congratulations on your promotion. Before you go... >Would you like to take this knife out of my back? >You'll probably need it again. > >-------------------------------------------------------------- >Happy Birthday, > >Uncle Dad! >(Available only in Tennessee , Kentucky & West Virginia ) > >---------------------------------------------------------------- >Happy birthday! >You look great for your age. > >Almost Lifelike! > >-------------------------------------------------------------- >When we were together, >you always said you'd die for me. >Now that we've broken up, >I think it's time you kept your promise. > >------------------------------------------------------------------------ >We have been friends for a very long time... > >let's say we stop? > >-------------------------------------------------------------------- >I'm so miserable without you >it's almost like you're here. > >------------------------------------------------------------------ >Congratulations on your new bundle of joy. >Did you ever find out who the father was? > >------------------------------------------------------------- >Your friends and I wanted to do something special for your >birthday... > >So we're having you put to sleep. > >-------------------------------------------------------------- >So your daughter's a hooker, >and it spoiled your day. > >Look at the bright side, it's really good pay!!! > > > >Enjoy and Merry HOHO!! |