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Isn't that a nice, cryptic title? I thought it was appropriate.
You guys noticed (obviously) that I'm selling my Focus. It'll likely be gone in the next few weeks. What I hadn't mentioned was my reason why.
I've been waiting for a few things to clear up before I went public with this. The reason I sold my Focus is because I'm going through (have finished doing the paperwork on) a separation from my wife. Yes, the same person you all met more than once is no longer with me.
I returned home last October from training in Ottawa to basically a sham of a marriage. She had obviously been planning this for a while but I never did get a date / timeframe of "when everything changed". She let it linger for a week of cold shouldering and moodiness and then brought the hammer down at her Dad's place after a Sudbury Wolves game. Classy eh?
So, after a month of angst and attempting to salvage my marriage, she got her ultimatum. She chose to walk away. All I have to say to that is (then and now) - vaya con dios!
I kept the house, the cars and fittingly all the debt. Not surprisingly, we managed to pay off all of her student loans last summer. :rolleyes:
I know now that I was a 6-year social and professional springboard for her and nothing more. Sad eh? I literally brought her from nothing to what I had thought was a great life and a great marriage. The only uptick she gets is that she apparently didn't cheat while she was plotting the death of our relationship.
Now, there's one... more... thing.
I won't be coming camping alone :lol:
I have a G/F. She's great. Beyond great, really. Those coming camping will (likely) get to meet her. As far as I know she's coming with me. Those who have me on FB can already see who she is / where we've been, etc.
I'm not going to tear down my ex cause she's already done that to herself. So, that's why I've been on sporadically since November and that's why I'm selling the Focus - I don't need two cars and I'd much rather drive the RX-8. I love the Focus, but hey... rotaries are one of my dreams to drive and now I get to drive my dreams!
Thanks to those who've been there for me as I've ranted through the last 5 months. I hope I haven't offended anyone that wasn't told before... it wasn't personal. Let's all hoist a beer at the camping trip and chill together.
Thanks fellas. :D
Daily driver 1: 2007 Jeep Wrangler Unlimited Sport "S"
33" BFG Mud-Terrain KM2s, lots of Rough Country gear - bumper, 2.5" lift, swaybar disconnects, Superwinch 10,000lb winch, Detroit Locker in rear D44 axle, custom exhaust, K+N filtercharger, Superchips-tuned.
Daily driver 2: 2006 Subaru Legacy GT
COBB Stage 1+ package - AccessPort tuner, COBB intake and airbox. Stage 2 coming shortly - COBB 3" AT stainless DP and race cat, custom 3" Magnaflow-based exhaust and Stage 2 COBB tune.
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Adam, as long as everything worked out for you for the better than cheers man. theres not much you can do when the other person fighting it the other way.
I saw the facebook stuff and wasnt sure what to make of it, i figured you let me/everyone know when the time was right.
'05 Grand Cherokee LTD Hemi
'02 black ZX5 ****currently on jack stands my parents garage missing a transmission****
--FC/OBX 4-2-1 Race Header--FS Flex--MBRP catback exhaust--AEM CAI--Brembo Brakes with Hawk HPS pads--Toucan(ractive) 9mm Plug wires--FC Plug wire cover--Polished aluminum Ractive Strut Bar
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hey man. good luck with the process. seems like you are taking it well
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Damn dude......
On the one hand, sorry you got treated so crappily (is that a word?...it is now!) by your ex......
But.....
GOOD ON YA for bouncing back so quickly! You obviously have a straight head on your shoulders and realised what she was doing without it totally destroying you (much like I did with mine 8 years ago).
So, I say CONGRATULATIONS on the new gal, and forward into your new life sir!
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I'll go Zen-like for a moment and utter the line "Things happen for a reason when they happen" better that it happen when it did as opposed to happening later when there were other things to be mindful of (children)
Good on you for coming out of this with your head held high :)
NefCanuck
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What?!
You're selling the focus?! LMAO
Yeah i kinda figured when i saw your Kijiji ad in the Northbay ads....
Funny thing is i've seen a few foci's off the board up for sale on Kijiji, really nice one out in Peterborough :o
Does your ex go with the car? lol
I hope you're still gonna gome out to the meets! Maybe i'll have to take a run up to North bay once i get my PW kit installed!
Well it's good to hear you've moved on and positive about the out come... even if it means selling the fofo!!
2002 pitch black ZX3
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ZX5focused,Apr 3 2008, 04:33 PM Wrote:Adam, as long as everything worked out for you for the better than cheers man. theres not much you can do when the other person fighting it the other way.
I saw the facebook stuff and wasnt sure what to make of it, i figured you let me/everyone know when the time was right.
[right][snapback]261168[/snapback][/right]
Yeah I too figured the same thing when I saw the photos on facebook a while back.
Best of luck to you Adam.
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SL8RZZX3,Apr 3 2008, 06:32 PM Wrote:Does your ex go with the car? lol
[right][snapback]261184[/snapback][/right]
LOL, Gordo - you don't want that kind of baggage! :P :lol:
Yeah, I/we should be making it out to a few meets. Obviously the biggest ones will command more of my effort to attend, like the FC camping trip that I've already reserved the site for.
Thanks for the support, guys. I was genuinely blindsided by this, and even her family faked ignorance and surprise. However, as time wore on I realized that this was a tad more orchestrated than I had initially anticipated.
Funny story: We were out at the bar last weekend (me, the G/F and her sister) and apparently my ex's new B/F came waltzing up (we were all outside, heading in). He eyeballed me all the way in, while I deliberately ignored him and watched him out of my peripheral vision.
Comment from my G/F's sister to her - "What is that guy, 50?" :rofl: :rofl:
Daily driver 1: 2007 Jeep Wrangler Unlimited Sport "S"
33" BFG Mud-Terrain KM2s, lots of Rough Country gear - bumper, 2.5" lift, swaybar disconnects, Superwinch 10,000lb winch, Detroit Locker in rear D44 axle, custom exhaust, K+N filtercharger, Superchips-tuned.
Daily driver 2: 2006 Subaru Legacy GT
COBB Stage 1+ package - AccessPort tuner, COBB intake and airbox. Stage 2 coming shortly - COBB 3" AT stainless DP and race cat, custom 3" Magnaflow-based exhaust and Stage 2 COBB tune.
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NOS2Go4Me,Apr 4 2008, 07:21 AM Wrote:Comment from my G/F's sister to her - "What is that guy, 50?" :rofl: :rofl:
[right][snapback]261229[/snapback][/right]
Actually, 41 with mad skillz :P
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2001 ZTS,Apr 4 2008, 08:48 AM Wrote:NOS2Go4Me,Apr 4 2008, 07:21 AM Wrote:Comment from my G/F's sister to her - "What is that guy, 50?" :rofl: :rofl:
[right][snapback]261229[/snapback][/right]
Actually, 41 with mad skillz :P
[right][snapback]261232[/snapback][/right]
HAHAHAHAHA
'05 Grand Cherokee LTD Hemi
'02 black ZX5 ****currently on jack stands my parents garage missing a transmission****
--FC/OBX 4-2-1 Race Header--FS Flex--MBRP catback exhaust--AEM CAI--Brembo Brakes with Hawk HPS pads--Toucan(ractive) 9mm Plug wires--FC Plug wire cover--Polished aluminum Ractive Strut Bar
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2001 ZTS,Apr 4 2008, 08:48 AM Wrote:NOS2Go4Me,Apr 4 2008, 07:21 AM Wrote:Comment from my G/F's sister to her - "What is that guy, 50?" :rofl: :rofl:
[right][snapback]261229[/snapback][/right]
Actually, 41 with mad skillz :P
[right][snapback]261232[/snapback][/right]
LMAO!!! :lol: :lol: :lol:
Daily driver 1: 2007 Jeep Wrangler Unlimited Sport "S"
33" BFG Mud-Terrain KM2s, lots of Rough Country gear - bumper, 2.5" lift, swaybar disconnects, Superwinch 10,000lb winch, Detroit Locker in rear D44 axle, custom exhaust, K+N filtercharger, Superchips-tuned.
Daily driver 2: 2006 Subaru Legacy GT
COBB Stage 1+ package - AccessPort tuner, COBB intake and airbox. Stage 2 coming shortly - COBB 3" AT stainless DP and race cat, custom 3" Magnaflow-based exhaust and Stage 2 COBB tune.
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2001 ZTS,Apr 4 2008, 08:48 AM Wrote:NOS2Go4Me,Apr 4 2008, 07:21 AM Wrote:Comment from my G/F's sister to her - "What is that guy, 50?" :rofl: :rofl:
[right][snapback]261229[/snapback][/right]
Actually, 41 with mad skillz :P
[right][snapback]261232[/snapback][/right]
Classic.
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Sorry to hear that your marriage is breaking up; while it's never a great feeling, from someone that's been there -- it's better that it happens when you're young enough to make the best of things; socially, emotionally, and financially.
I see way too many people that stick it out through a crappy marriage, only to go through a divorce at 50, where they don't have a pot to piss in, have no social connections, etc. Consider it a second chance.
Good luck. :)
TEAM PITA: Don't settle for a wannabe, only accept the real deal.
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What's the saying again... "What doesn't kill you will only make you stronger"?
Well, you're stronger, and still have an RX-8. Win-Win? :D
Joking aside, sorry to hear about the loss of money/time. I had a relationship years ago that went on for about 4 years, and was roughly the same thing. One day, she up and told me it was over, and that she had been using me for connections and whatnot. It's not fun, but you learn and move on. Seems like you have already, so enough counseling talk. :)
Everything works out in the end...
Ryan and the Silver Sedan
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![[Image: 49951.png]](http://www.fuelly.com/sig-metric/49951.png)
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NOS2Go4Me,Apr 4 2008, 09:59 AM Wrote:2001 ZTS,Apr 4 2008, 08:48 AM Wrote:NOS2Go4Me,Apr 4 2008, 07:21 AM Wrote:Comment from my G/F's sister to her - "What is that guy, 50?" :rofl: :rofl:
[right][snapback]261229[/snapback][/right]
Actually, 41 with mad skillz :P
[right][snapback]261232[/snapback][/right]
LMAO!!! :lol: :lol: :lol:
[right][snapback]261237[/snapback][/right]
Places you'll never find Andrew: Ghey Pride, any country ending in "stan" and a redneck bar in Sudbury.
Nos and I have talked about all the divorce crap last month so no new news for me and we all know how good things turned out with my own in every respect. I don't see a down side for him or I. I wouldn't recommend anyone get married these days, there really is no point. If you do want to go that route, male or female, be damn sure to marry someone with more to loose than you do.
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04-05-2008, 07:32 AM
(This post was last modified: 04-05-2008, 07:32 AM by focusracer.)
Something very similar to this happened to a friend of mine a couple years back. He came home one to a wife who "Just didn't want to be married anymore." 2 kids, a house, everything. He tried so hard to salvage that marriage which ended up with him eventually living downstairs so he could still be with his boys daily and spending a lot of nights drinking by himself. He finally gave up the notion of saving the crappy hell hole marriage and moved out after she started having random guys spending the night and stuff.
I'm glad in some respects that I have a very bad and tarnished view of marriage from watching my parents over the years. Also glad that I didn't get married when I was much younger and thought I could do it. She had been cheating on me while away at university and was wanting to continue that relationship, I was blindsided by that about 3 months before the wedding. Best part of that, she blamed me.
I do however, love strippers...
No name, Cheap and Slutty.
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focusracer,Apr 4 2008, 04:32 PM Wrote:Something very similar to this happened to a friend of mine a couple years back. He came home one to a wife who "Just didn't want to be married anymore." 2 kids, a house, everything. He tried so hard to salvage that marriage which ended up with him eventually living downstairs so he could still be with his boys daily and spending a lot of nights drinking by himself.[right][snapback]261293[/snapback][/right]
He's not refering to me but that "could have been me", as things got worse all I did was just work harder to please "it" for the "family good", got used to being used and if a guy is allowed to admit it(?) abused. I was in a mental state. I lived in my own basement for two years and posted here in the thousands.
She married me because she was intent on changing me. How stupid is that? You can't change someone and in my case, based on countless female references, why would you want to? The Facebookers know I have countless women going back 20+ years who profess I am the best thing to ever happen to them. I only married because I figured "this is as good as it gets" and had spent the previous three years screwing everything that had walked or crawled in Owen Sound and thus got my ya-ya's out in the process.
Once married I stayed good, gave my all and was dry for too long. Goes to show how much I am willing to give when I do commit.
Oh Lord, after a crappy winter, I am in my happy place again now, women want me and men want to be me. East York's next millionaire has raised a fine boy and up'd the threat level to: "Uber Charming", has hot and cold running women and debating which one to road trip to Cali in the WRX with.
Lesson: NEVER SETTLE!
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^^^hooolllyyy......eeeasy there PiMp DadDy Andrew
:lol:
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they see me rollin', they be hatin'
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x2 after the day I had! :lol:
I'll post details later.
Daily driver 1: 2007 Jeep Wrangler Unlimited Sport "S"
33" BFG Mud-Terrain KM2s, lots of Rough Country gear - bumper, 2.5" lift, swaybar disconnects, Superwinch 10,000lb winch, Detroit Locker in rear D44 axle, custom exhaust, K+N filtercharger, Superchips-tuned.
Daily driver 2: 2006 Subaru Legacy GT
COBB Stage 1+ package - AccessPort tuner, COBB intake and airbox. Stage 2 coming shortly - COBB 3" AT stainless DP and race cat, custom 3" Magnaflow-based exhaust and Stage 2 COBB tune.
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